What happens when the owner runs the company badly:
my story

What it looks like from the inside

The owner runs on one idea: "I can handle it, I can carry it." From outside it looks like strength. In practice it looks like this:

• He does everything himself: walkthroughs, estimates, supply runs, phone calls, fixing other people's work.
• He looks the other way when something is done wrong. Today he says nothing, tomorrow it happens again.
• He cannot tell a person straight that the work was bad. He is afraid of the conflict.
• He acts like a father to the crew: covers for them, forgives them, finishes their work.

Where it ends

You can put up with it for a while. Nobody knows how long. And the real question is: why are you doing it?

Then comes the boiling point. Then burnout. Then the talk about walking away from it all. The World Health Organization describes burnout as a syndrome that comes from chronic workplace stress that has not been successfully managed, with three signs: exhaustion, distance or cynicism about the job, and doing the job worse. It is not classified as a disease; it is what the work does to a person.

And it can get worse. You kept saying "I can carry it, I can handle it," you burn out, and then the rumors start, everyone talking about what a bad boss you are. Or the business ends up deep in the red because of that strange kindness. You cannot pay people what you owe them, payroll is late, and you are in a hole looking for any way to pay it all back.

And you do pay it back! You promise you will, because you are not a jerk, you have always been a decent person. But in a crisis nobody will care about that. They will walk all over you.

The stress and overload of managing people got so bad for me that at times my vision shut off. I was shy and closed by nature, and every hard conversation cost me a lot. Thank God, I am getting free of that.

Why being a father to the crew does not work

Wanting to take care of your people is human. But that kind of relationship is never win-win. You lose, in how you feel and often in money. And the worker loses too: nobody tells him where he went wrong, so he never gets better.

What the owner owes, and what the worker owes

• The owner gives every resource, every tool and every task. Clearly, completely, on time.
• The worker hears it, takes it on and does it.
• And the worker's job is also to get better and push the company forward, the same as the owner's. A company grows when both pull.

Rules, not harshness

A company needs rules and limits it works within. A worker has to know what he is doing, and he has to know what happens if the work is sloppy or late.

That does not mean being harsh. It means having rules. We live inside rules all day: laws, traffic rules, the rules ships and planes move by, the rules for how a medicine works. Nobody calls traffic rules cruel. They are why everybody gets home.

What that can look like in a remodeling company:

• Every task has the same shape: what to do, by when, and what "done" means.
• A few rules everyone knows, for example: before and after photos the same day, warn ahead of time if a date will slip, a callback is fixed on your own time.
• Consequences are named in advance, not invented in a moment of anger: first time a conversation, second time in writing, third time you part ways.
• If you are letting go of an employee rather than a subcontractor, check your state's rules on the final paycheck and termination before you do it.

A problem you cannot let grow

When something goes wrong and everyone looks away, it grows like a tumor. I hate to use that word, but that is what it is. Either it kills you or you treat it. What matters is not waiting until it is too late.

One person who misses deadlines while nobody says anything teaches the whole crew that deadlines do not matter. The longer you stay quiet, the more it costs to fix.

You do not have to be nice. Be fair

I want to tell you this: you are not obligated to be nice. You can simply be fair. To your people. To yourself too. To your family. To the time you put into building the company, which is often years, even decades, of work.

Do not let that be destroyed.

Hire slow, fire fast

• Hire slow: do not take the first person who can start tomorrow. Give a paid trial job, call the people he worked for before, and show him the rules on day one.
• Fire fast: if the rules get broken again and again and the conversation did not help, do not drag it out for months. Every month of waiting is paid for by you, your family and the rest of the crew.

Where to start this week

1. 01Write down five rules for your company on one page and show them to everyone.
2. 02Have the one direct conversation you keep putting off. Calm, facts only: what happened, what it should be, what happens if it happens again.
3. 03Hand off one task you do yourself that someone else could do.
4. 04Agree on consequences with the crew now, while nobody is angry.
5. 05Keep one evening a week with no work, for your family. That is a rule too.

If the stress is already hitting your health

If the load has started to affect your health, the way it hit my vision, see a doctor instead of pushing through. The company does not survive without its owner. Take care of yourself the way you take care of the business.

Hang in there, brother. Change something

So, brother, hang in there! Change something!

Come to my banya night, it is free. Join the community, and let us move forward together. No judgment!